Tuesday, September 13, 2011


Daddy, look at me.

I am not your mistake, I am what you mistook
When you forced mommy down to the bed and didn’t even know her name.

Daddy, look at me.
They say, I have your eyes and smile.
Is that why you can’t bear to gaze into my face? Because you’ll see yours?

Daddy, look at me.
I am what you created, in a moment of anger
In a moment of rage and lust
I am from cursing, I am from blood and sweat and piercing cries
I am from you,
Double gift to mommy and me

Daddy, look at me,
Come for me in the night
When the monsters under the bed grasp at my ankles
Come running for me when I cry in fright
When the monsters whisper your name

Daddy, look at me,
I’m here, I’m what you wanted when you were little, like me
Scant five years old and dreaming, dreaming of your own family
Promising baby-dolls you’d never hit them like your daddy did
Naming them after your favourite flowers

Daddy, look at me,
I’ll be your Daisy, I’ll open up my petals and let you in
I’ll let you buzz around me like a honey-drunk bumblebee
If you promise to stop plucking my petals
If you promise to stop trying to rip out my roots because you’re ashamed to be in them
If you promise to stop trying to block out the sun.

Daddy, look at me
Not with fury and breath like whiskey,
With vengeance in your eyes at the child that did nothing, and the mother who said nothing
And the soft blue eyes that were yours looking out at you,
Just begging to be held by you,
Just begging to be loved by you.

Daddy, look at me
I am from, you. Your past gift to the present,
The baby nobody wanted but sacrificed for anyway
I am from blood, sweat and piercing cries,
I am from you, daddy.
Look at me.

1 comment: